Me: Mom, I was so good in my pole dancing class I was thinking about applying to work as a stripper here for extra money.

Mom: Que? What are you talking about? Are you crazy?

Me: Well, I could use the money and I was really good at it.  Almost like I was born to strip. Like a ballerina, but only a stripper.  Do you see where I’m going here?

Mom: Que vulgar! You can’t! What will the Southerner think?

Me: He’s behind my decision 100%. He can’t wait to come see me dance.

Mom: What!!! Come home.  You’ve been gone too long.  You need your mother.

Me: April Fools, mujer! I got you.

Mom: It’s not April 1st yet!

Me: It is in my time zone.

Mom: So you don’t want to be a stripper?  Promise me.  No money in it for you anyway.  You’re tetas aren’t big enough.