I was asked to make a Christmas list this year. My list consisted of a request for Amazon gift cards and some fancy shampoo, because when I’m put on the spot I have a hard time thinking of a single thing that I want.  I consider this a good thing.  Or I think of things that are probably not acceptable to state out loud: cunnilingus for life?, my own private zebra-striped jet?, a personal chauffeur?

I love lists, but Christmas lists weird me out.  For me, the joy of getting a gift is encompassed by the element of surprise and level of thoughtfulness you put into it.  So, when asked to hand over my list, I lied.  Or kind of lied.  Why? Because the things on my list are special to me.  Some of them are silly and sparkly.  Some of them are simple and delicate.  They’re special because they’re frivolous items that I’ve kept to myself over the  years, things that I would never actually buy unless money was no object.  Because I don’t need them.  And I don’t want to live in a world where I can have every single thing I don’t need.

That said, here are a few things on my real list that I don’t need that make me happy. (Click on the photo for product info):